distractions and dimensions of life

I'm having mixed feelings today... It's weird in our house. Even though I didn't see her much because she hid out in her room so much, our oldest did hang out in the kitchen or watch TV once in a while. Now, she's nearly four hours away at college where I can't see her at all or hear her coming and going, and I feel like a part of me is missing. The house feels a little emptier and I'm sort of grieving, even though I can call or text her. (She probably won't call home, except yesterday when she realized she had forgotten a couple of items already.)

Hubby and I followed her in a separate vehicle--her little SUV was stuffed with belongings she had packed for her new temporary home in the dorm. However, we didn't contribute much, except to help her adjust her bed. (Each roommate has a separate bunk that can be set from high to low height.) I just hope my kid doesn't fall out of bed since she wanted it so high.

While hubby drove following our daughter to college and then without her coming back home, we talked a little here and there. Other times I read news online, but mostly, I had hoped to get some writing in on Book 15 of Starfire Angels: Forgotten Worlds.

I did have some great ideas come to me on the long 3.5 hours there and another 3.5 hours back home. That's how it goes even at home. I can't sit for hours at a time and just write--I alternate between reading news and writing (I'm not on social media, except MeWe). I find that I get more ADD symptoms as I get older and my thyroid condition progresses and my other hormones also go wonky into that time of a woman's life. (I can't imagine why anyone would want to artificially induce menopause by having a hysterectomy if they didn't absolutely have to--the regular transition is miserable enough!)

Those ideas that came in the long hours on the road have advanced the story immensely, but my concentration has improved recently. Much of that was helped by switching my thyroid meds and changing the dosage. Hashimoto's is awful in that one day the dose is perfect and the next, you might feel hyper on it, so I tweak it but through diet, I mostly keep it stable. Luckily, I don't swing hyper-hypo anymore. Now it's just degrees of hypo, which is troublesome enough. I think that something in the generic meds was causing as many problems for me as no meds (mostly brain fog like what happens with certain foods and ingredients, the reason I mostly just eat single-ingredient foods). Those fillers make a big difference, along with the dose. My writing cognition and creativity are so much better that it's night and day! I feel like my old self again more often than not, and this series gets easier to write. That's why I've been struggling with the last few books, I think.

My hope is that I continue to improve, because it makes the writing so much easier. I just have to get past the grief and worry of having a kid out of the house now.

However, I can say that I have a few title ideas for Book 15 and had an epiphany on the central theme of this book, which connects with the title. The whole book is up to about 31,000 words, and things are starting to make sense and fit together. It's weird how there's something there that needs to come out but I don't always consciously know what that is until a certain point, just like a reader might not. But there's something that develops until it all makes sense. Writing is as much, maybe more so, of an adventure than reading.

Thanks for reading!

PS-- once I'm done writing the first draft of Book 15, I'll edit and publish Book 13. Follow me on this blog or sign up to receive email notices by completing the form at https://melanienilles.com/contact/.

picking up the pace

It's been several days since the brain fog and dizzy spells lifted and I started getting back to writing after a period off. That illness-induced break helped tremendously for me to review what I had of Book 15 and to re-evaluate how to proceed with the plot. I had prayed for help and had it, albeit not as I expected. God works in mysterious ways, using what he created to influence our lives and affect the outcomes in answer our prayers.

It wasn't fun being sick, but it was what I needed. He is the most brilliant storyteller of all; we just have to trust, which is known as faith. We're all living in the greatest story ever told.

I'll spare you further depths of my faith. I'm here to talk about writing, although my faith does influence me, so it is a part of everything I am.

Anyway, Starfire Angels: Forgotten Worlds Book 15 is moving along at a better pace, although behind where I'd like to be in the process. I don't know if I'll catch up, but one never knows. I'm not pushing myself to a schedule. I'd like to publish four books a year, but that's just not happening. I have a busy real life, so I'm not going to stress about it if I don't meet my goal. If the story comes at a fast pace, excellent. If not--if I have trouble feeling clear about the story--I won't sweat it. I want to feel confident in the story I write, even if that means a little extra time to think about it. It has to be right by me.

I hope you appreciate the dedication I have for this series. I am going to see the whole series arc through to the end that I have in mind, but it will take time. And the series does grow a bit more complex over time, so there's more to think about, even if it is episodic.

I'm just glad to be able to focus again to write. I was miserable with that brain fog, and that was much worse than what I periodically have from other causes. But that break helped me get unstuck in the story and it's now moving along like it should.